I just don’t know why I am writing this post or what the feelings behind this idea were. May be few days’ back I was talking to one of my good old friend and saw her blog and I guess that was the catalyst for doing this.
I can’t believe I just used the term catalyst. Gosh!
Hmm I must tell you that, yesterday I have broken one of my promises and one of my New Year resolutions, that I won’t be writing anything on my personal journal anymore.
But guess what, I did!
I realized lately I have become so lazy and what not, I just don’t know what’s going on. I have lost all interest in everything, I don’t study at all and the worst part my mom started to scold me after years, and I hate that.
Since this is my first post of this year, so I must write about how everything went over the last two month. To be honest it was not good at least nothing compared to what I expected or I am still expecting. I need to work hard on many things and the list is just increasing day by day.
Finally I was able to apologize to two people and I was not talking to them for a long time. Finally I did it and tried to explain as honestly as I could. I regretted for whatever wrong things that I have done and all the wrong decisions which were made by me and how those affected so many people. Yes, it took me a long time to have the realization but when I did I was too scared stiff. I asked them to forgive me, both of them promised, now let’s see.
I still need to apologize to another person; it’s been four month the last time we talked. Few days back when I saw her eyes, I was so shocked and was not aware of what was going on. No matter whatever the misunderstandings still remains between us, I have decided to make everything as it was before. She was my best friend and we shared so many stuffs. So I called her, but couldn’t talk. Texted her and our class timings don’t match with each other. Then there came a series of Haartal and everything so we couldn’t see each other. I just hope everything will be fine and I can’t see her cry.
I am enjoying my friend circles and they are very cool and not to mention my new club where I joined and it’s just so amazing. The instructors they are the best and all the elder bros are so caring and everything. I just hope within this year I can make and design my own robot. I am still in contact with the coworkers of the clubs where I worked before, though it’s kind of very tough for me to attend their meetings and everything, but still I try my best to help them in any way I can.
Now I am finally convinced that you can’t really judge your friends. They are the best blessings one can get. No matter if anyone tries to go away from your life intentionally or if someone thinks that keeping a safe distance is the better option. One thing I can’t deny is that those friends are really special, for whom you cry to your Lord and pray always so that they always keep on shining as they always do.
Those people are really lucky who got someone in their life…a blessed friend …nah I should not complete this …
To do list: wok on the complains raised against me…someone once said, she prayed so that I get fat, so I need to get thin and work out regularly. Someone was always expecting that I am a failure, and I should not comment on that. And there is that one person who once told that perfection is boring and I should not try to make everything perfect. While the most important person, I just don’t know what she thinks.
All I know is my days are getting over and I am not anymore what I am. So now is the time either all the dreams are going to shatter one by one or maybe I can pile them again from the scraps. Still I have time no matter how small that is, I just need to convince someone, someday.
And yes, I also believe in Happy Ending.