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Saturday, 8 December 2012

'Stop Expecting', A realization, A title-less Love Story.

Often time we fail to remember the fact that, the people and persons with whom we deal with in our everyday life do have an existence of their own. It’s not obligatory that they will take the resolution and plan their future according to your own expectations and needs.
And that's where the inconsistency begins and we start judging people, at the very end,
We end up ruining the mast of relationship that took years of effort to erect them.

It's quite customary and natural that a person will always yearn for the best for him/her future. They want to stand out in their line of business, they want to draw and color the very fine points of their dream, most of all they feel like to live a life. But a moment or two, situation changes, people moves, our self-body matures with point in time, so it’s basic necessitate changes and our level of trance shatters and we start to weave a new narrative - almost of our own volition.

So dear, on that very instant of time, when you are feeling that you are all by yourself and you are the biggest loser that ever lived; please, wait and rethink of the entire development.

Most of the time, I am in no doubt it happens with all of us, and more or less all the cases are very analogous - we start to expect from people. When thing happens just like we planned and hoped for, we begin to suppose and try to force our self to make us consider that, the person who did all of these, is the finest person without whom our life is nothing. We take initiative to make them our best friends, found to hang out with them more often and sometime crossing all the parameters, we end up falling for them. It is not crucial that everything of our life will be picture perfect and shit happens. Sometime veracity doesn’t allow our loved ones to meet our expectations, lack of communiqué occurs. As a result the distance increases with time to time, making us feel that, we have chosen the erroneous person and shared so many precious emotions – now all have been wasted.

Few years back, one certain evening I was very depressed about certain matter related to my family and edification, and just out of nowhere one of my friend knocked me on skype, and she gave me a first-rate line of quote: "Don't make them your priority for whom you are just an option". Just to let you know, I am a awfully giant fan of quotes and that line seemed to be very authoritative and is indeed something to work-on as it should be. Over the last two years I have taken many significant decisions based on that and the quote helped me a lot with the exception of one case.

The case is not that straightforward. It’s a matter, which is of utmost significance to me.
It’s about the person I like.

Since my childhood, I don't know, if I ever wanted something so bad - the way I wanted her, the way I loved her. I remember once, one of my elder cousins told me, "Love is blind, and Love will make you blind. But loving someone is unique and being loved by someone is precious. Be careful, don't get weak by the weakness of love, it will ruin everything”.
I presume it happened to me.

I tried to be honest and loyal and tried to give her all the respect that I could. But deep down, I guess I forgot the prescription. I emphasized more on what I feel about her how she completes me. I overlooked the fact about what she feels about me. I used to sense maybe she is a bit shy or wants me to make the move. I used to reflect on those slight nods flavored by her fine-looking effortless smile to be the reflected liking for me. Dear, I was so wide of the mark.

This is not a love story, neither a complain sheet, nor a letter of regret but something I realized.

When people regrets about something where they could have done something, they often complain that either they have walked away from the problem or haven't tried to straighten out the thing directly, face-to-face. So I have decided, I just can't let it go, after all for one and a half years, I don't think I could get ahead of a single day without thinking of her. So losing her would be a big loss, not just a dream will shatter, the story of my life which I have written so beautifully will end. Not to mention the future plans - phew!

What if the other person intentionally tries to make a distance from you, ignores you,
and tries to stay away?
Dude, dude, dude...take it lightly, it happens, just think positively, maybe be she is just not sure about something, as you said earlier, maybe she had other plans for herself. And just like few minutes back, you yourself have written that - it’s quite natural, the person may not think about you or like you more than just a friend. But hei! this is just a presumption. You have to converse to her in a straight line; otherwise, things will get worse. So the best possible way to resolve this is by talking truthfully, from the very start to the end.

What if she repeatedly ignores me?
Bhooh! You haven't tried as it should it again.

I did, No progress...what now?
Invite her somewhere on an occasion, loosen up and try to talk, be careful don't force yourself.

I failed! I don't know what to do now...
Request her one more time, it's been a long time so maybe she is not sure or is unenthusiastic.

She didn't show there anything I can do for the very last time?
Ok, I don't know whether I should be saying this or not, why don't you call her and tell her everything as simply as you can? Hun! I am sure this thing might work perfectly, and who knows you will start the next volume of your story. Good Luck.

I called her, she didn’t pick up the phone neither she called me back.

A Month passed by, and we don't have any connections in between us anymore. So sad! I never thought it would be turning out in this way. I asked for my part many times, am I confused about her, every time I got the similar answer; she is the one for me. Yes, it’s correct that our circumstances are restricted and we can't fulfill every demand and meets our anticipation. But sacrifice and dedication along with compromising ourselves helps us to budge forward and doing so in a better way means living a life.

Whenever I prayed to Allah (swt) about her and ourselves, I always asked to give us enough strength to take the best decisions of our life so that we can have the best things that he have planned for us. Allah (swt) is the best planner. He is aware, He sees and hears everything.

There is no place for despair because you have confidence in knowing that it’s God Himself who is in charge of everything, the All Seeing, All Knowing, and All Fair and Wise God:

“And for those who fear Allah, He always prepares a way out, and He provides for him from sources he never could imagine. And if anyone puts his trust in Allah, sufficient is Allah for him. For Allah will surely accomplish His purpose: 
verily, for all things has Allah appointed a due proportion.” 
(Quran, 65: 2-3)

So, my dear friend thanks for everything.
You have changed me in so many levels over the last two years;
I don't think that anyone could ever do so, or will.
You are one of a kind.
It’s true, someone like you is so hard to find, and I am not sure whether I will ever find anyone.

Maybe, I was wrong all through.
If so, and if this thing reaches you then do give me a chance to rectify myself.

No matter what, I am never going to stop, I will keep on improving myself, and it’s a promise.

You will be always in my prayers, and now I can't think of praying anything else than be with you in the future, only if our fate allows, only if He, Allah (swt) planned it for us.
Otherwise this is the last bye.

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Thanks for the response, I really Appreciate.